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A year ago, I wrote So That it Continues to Matter, an essay for BYU’s Brimhall Essay Contest. Nothing came of it, but I’m really proud of the essay I produced.
I decided to enter the contest again this year.
The essay requirements are as follows:
- About 750 words
- Written as a personal essay/reflection
- Incorporates the chosen founder(s) in some way
- Bases the essay on the chosen theme for the year
This year, 2026, the chosen founders are Jeffrey R. and Patricia T. Holland, and the theme is, “The Reach of Divine Love.”
Although I did not win again this year, I wanted to share my essay with you! Here goes!
After five years and seven months of desperate, tear-filled, and consistent pleading, I received an answer to my prayers. It didn’t come immediately or as I expected, but it was a tender answer, something that will forever be cemented into who I am. During those years of pleading, I begged Heavenly Father for help finding love and gratitude for Jesus Christ. I wanted a personal relationship with Him, but genuine love and sincere gratitude for Him and His atonement seemed out of reach. No matter how badly I wanted it, I couldn’t seem to find these feelings anywhere.
During the seven weeks I spent as a For the Strength of Youth (FSY) counselor in the summer of 2022, God granted the beginning of my lifelong love and ineffable gratitude for Jesus Christ. This miracle was possible because of the Divine love God has for the youth. This love was so powerful that it led me to consistently ponder how much I loved them. It was easy, honestly. I will always remember and cherish the moments I got to spend getting to know them, laughing with them, feeling the spirit with them, learning with them (and from them), and even crying with them. I thought about how I hoped and prayed they felt God’s infinite love for them, just as I had. During these times, I also thought about how Jesus Christ saved them, and as my love for the youth grew, I found myself feeling grateful that Jesus Christ chose to perform the infinite atonement for them. Eventually, I felt grateful He atoned for me too. In other words, because of my love for the youth, I began to love Jesus Christ.
Since the summer of 2022, my love and gratitude for Christ have expanded and intensified in ways I always hoped and prayed would happen; it’s sweeter, more precious, and more wonderful than I ever thought it could be. Now, with all the energy of my heart and soul, I want to shout from the rooftops my love for Jesus Christ. This precious and beautiful love and gratitude grew as I was continually given glimpses of the perfect love Heavenly Father has for His children; God granted me the ability to see the youth through His eyes, giving me access to feel the Divine love He has for each of them.
As leaders of Brigham Young University, President Jeffrey R. and Patricia T. Holland also spent countless hours with young adults. They, too, expressed great love for the young adults they had stewardship over. Through their love for the young adults, I wonder if, like me, their love and gratitude for the Savior grew too. I wonder if they also found that the two great commandments work best hand-in-hand: I’ve learned that the love I have for others and the love I have for the Savior work together in a cyclical process—as my love for the Savior grows, so too does my love for others. As my love for others grows, so too does my love for the Savior. This process proves that Divine love is relentless, persistent, steadfast, and eternal.
President and Sister Holland cherished Jesus Christ, as shown by their many messages of His goodness and everlasting mercy. They taught that because of Jesus Christ and His love for us, we can hold onto hope for the “High Priest of Good Things to Come.” We can find serenity, peace, and wholeness in Christ. It means, “Heaven is cheering [us] on today, tomorrow, and forever.” It means our prayers are heard and answered.
It’s now been almost ten years since I began pleading for Heavenly Father’s help in gaining a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I am grateful that He answered my prayers and that my love for Jesus Christ grows each day. In addition to the youth I met at FSY, President Holland played a crucial role in answering my prayers. He declared that Jesus will “grasp us as we fall, hold us with His might … and lift us to eternal life.” These words comforted and sustained me during my time of waiting, showing me that Heavenly Father was aware of my pleas and wanted me to keep asking. President and Sister Holland taught that our efforts matter, and they exemplified that we can be conquerors through Him because we love Him. We can become “conquerors through Him that loved us.”
Thank you so much for reading. Feel free to click the link embedded in the title (at the top of my essay) to see my sources. I decided to leave them out of this blog post for simplicity’s sake.